Sunday, August 29, 2010

another sometimes

sometimes your song would play out of the blues on my ipod,

and everything would come back,

everything, except you.

sometimes when i go out i would meet the people you know,

the people who are very close to you,

smile at them and say hi,

and everything would come back,

everything, except you

sometimes i spend the night in places i don't recognize,

doing things that i would forget of doing the next day,

thinking about how i would spend the nights with you, if you were still here,

and everything would come back,

everything, except you

sometimes i walk around aimlessly at night,

and somehow find myself in a room

where the tv is turned on to a soccer match,

and everything would come back,

everything, except you.

sometimes i wake up smiling in the morning,

and read the text messages from friends on my phone,

and smile,

and then everything would come back,

everything, except you

sometimes i dream about you,

every night i realize that i just wasted another dream on you,

and then everything would come back,

everything, except you

you always find a way to get to me.

but please do tell me love,

why i still can't find away to leave when you have already left a million sometimes ago

i love you most ardently, 11:48 PM.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

30 characteristics of the perfect guy

i made this by myself about my perfect guy.

this was inspired by a conversation i had last night and a few moments ago

1. be able to play the piano and guitar

2. plays soccer regularly and would stay up all night just to watch it

3. tell me to download good songs regularly

4. smart, especially in subjects like math and physics

5. tan

6. tall

7. chubby

8. likes traveling

9. enjoys going shopping with me

10. wears cool shoes

11. neat handwriting

12. hair must cover his forehead, or at least a little part of it

13. spontaneous and surprising

14. goes to church with me every sunday

15. doesn't text me every single second

16. understands that the most perfect trip we could ever go on together would be to paris

17. texts me good morning, every morning before i go to school

18. says i love you only when he truly mean it

19. knows that i would rather prefer beautiful pink daisies as a present than anything complicated and expensive like necklaces and bracelets

20. teaches me how to play the guitar

21. doesn't like to read but understands that i on the other hand, really like to read

22. likes to play wii sports, mariokart and nerf guns

23. talks to me randomly in some strange language that i won't ever understand

24. patient and conservative

25. likes dogs

26. dark hair

27. understands my thoughts, like when i say i mean something but i actually don't, he would know.

28. knows that another perfect date would be going to a concert together and pigging out on burger king on the way home

29. knows that i love flying kites, walking on the beach, the color pink, hot air balloons, chocolate waffles, and really really long letters

and last but not least,

30. can win the hearts of anyone, especially my extremely difficult brothers

i love you most ardently, 8:05 PM.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

l'amor che move il sole e l'altre stelle

i haven't written a lot because i have experienced scads of writer's bloc in the past month. i have also spent most of my nights reading endlessly, something which i haven't done in a fairly long time mainly because i haven't found the perfect book; you know, the one that you simply can't put down when reading. and now, most nights, i have my head buried under an old copy of eat pray love, a book written so beautifully that i just want to quote sentence after sentence. because unlike any other books i've read, this was the first one to truly challenge every view i have in life and turn them around, a hundred and eighty degrees, to a world of new perspectives. but, world changing feelings aside, the lesson which i am most grateful of the book for teaching me was, surprisingly, sleep.

so here is a list of my infinitely flawed understanding, several views by which i currently live my life by, and although everyday as i bring myself either nearer or further to the Truth these things will change, i am still unboundedly thankful because they can at the least make me sleep.

1. i don't like the idea that we humans do not deserve anything or the understanding that everything beautiful in this world exists only to tempt us and lead us to the 'the path of the devil'. i believe that these things are placed in this world by a truly loving God for us to find pleasure in; to clothe ourselves with such beauty of the world and praise him in return, for being such a magnificent God as to having the interminable dexterity to create such beauties.

2. i think the most fundamental aspect of faith is God and not religion. i'm still ambivalent about people who are so constricted as to believing that their religion is the only way to heaven because really, i believe that faith never started with religions in the first place, but one powerful and magnificent God.

3. the simplest form of happiness can be found amidst complete and utter nothingness. only when people can learn to be happy with nothingness can they find absolute contentment regardless of all circumstances in life.

4. a person needs to learn how to take care of his or her self. loving yourself is not and should not be considered vain, because you are only caring for yourself, something which without doubt, God wants you to do, because he loves you, so why can't you love yourself? there is no such thing as loneliness and before people can truly find friendship in others, they have to find friendship in themselves.

and that's when i realized that

5. you can't really love someone, until you have loved yourself.

i love you most ardently, 5:07 PM.